MVT: Most Valuable Tweeters

Evan Oglesby
"Just woke up from a much needed nap. Ready to Paint the town"

How I See It: Urban Dictionary defines “paint the town” as “to appear at a number of different parties.” So either Evan is a painter in the offseason, or he is about to have a wild night.

Nate Robinson
"Man we might be stuck in DC for another night with all this snow nooooooo!!!! I can't stand the snow! Word aapp!"

How I See It: Every time “DC” is brought up in relation to basketball, I feel the urge to make a Gilbert Arenas joke. It’s an epidemic.

Shelden Williams
"yea so i saw that obama was at the duke game!! he might be bad luck for collegiate sports haha!!"

How I See It: And now he is trying to change the BCS system ... but if he is bad luck, I still don’t see how it can get much worse.

Shawne Merriman
"Can somebody ask @OGOchoCinco where is the charity event"

How I See It: Can you?

Grant Hill
"RT @OMGFacts: Billy goats urinate on their own heads to smell more attractive to females. #omgfacts"

How I See It: It doesn’t work with humans. Not that I’ve tried or anything. (I was desperate!)

Thurman Thomas
"I’m I paying for theseGitmo detainees on trial, let them rots"

How I See It: Hey Rush Limbaugh, can we send the statue of you at Ralph Wilson Stadium to Guantanamo? That thing is disgusting, Thurman. Let it rot.

Kerron Clement
"All is not lost…still the 3rd half…"

How I See It: Yeah but if it gets to a 4th or 5th half, then we can probably say that all is lost.

Tommy Lasorda
"I love the MLB Network. They are replaying the 1978 NLCS right now where the Dodgers beat the Phillies."

How I See It: Tommy, sorry to break it to you, but you are the only one watching.

Nate Robinson
"Just woke up this morning gotta thax God I dnt no but 2day seems kinda add, no bark n from da dog no smog momma cook n breakfast wit no hog!"

How I See It: If anyone can make any sense of this, I say that you can try out for the Knicks. Actually even if you can’t make any sense of this, you still can try out for the Knicks.

Mark May
"USC as usual dominating ND"

How I See It: Mark May as usual bashing Notre Dame and promoting USC.

Jessica Gysin
"First rain of the year...its kinda nice"

How I See It: Despite how persuasive Jessica in a bikini can be, she's pushing it with this one.

Braylon Edwards
"Only been here a week but I'm lovin the jets fans. J-E-T-S jets jets jets"

How I See It: I've emailed this to Braylon and his people for posterity. I'll see how he feels in about 8 weeks.

Nate Robinson
"Got a game today, we play philly we gotta make some shots and play great defense"

How I See It: If you want to win, then yes. I think Nate's previous tweet read, "we are driving to the store we gotta put the key in the ignition and not hit any other cars".

Nicole Hage
"Ok I'm doing it! I'm going now to get some bangs! Ahhh"

How I See It: "And after that, I'm going to order some Papa John's for dinner! I'm going to do that, not Domino's! AHHHH!"

Jozy Altidore
":( :( :( :( :( :( :("

How I See It: Don't fret Jozy. If you read this from right to left, it looks like smiley faces.

Stuart Schweigert
"Tigers Choke. Suicide will be considered."

How I See It: I can understand the extreme reaction, Stuart. Not only did you play for the worst pro football team ever last year, THEY CUT YOU! I'm more worried about your sanity than the Tigers'.

Leonard Little
"Watching Rehab. I guess it's a pool at the Hard Rock hotel in Vegas where people hang out. I don't know because Ive never been to Vegas."

How I See It: ... there really should be an "Irony Alert" on Twitter.

Bill Stewart
"In life, as in a football game, the principle to follow is: Hit the line hard. -Theodore Roosevelt"

How I See It: Funny, Michael Irvin and Lawrence Taylor lived by the same motto.

Nate Robinson
"Guess who I just seen? SMH"

How I See It: I'm going to guess it wasn't an English teacher.

Dwayne Wade
"Orlando whts the word. whts to do out here???"

How I See It: Well, there's Disney World. Since you're Dwayne Wade though, I'd recommend going to Wherever The Hell You Feel Like. They'll treat you pretty well there.

Cowboys TE Martellus Bennett
"On the plane. Denver here we come. When wheels touch down u know Marty B in town."

How I See It: I actually don’t think anyone in Denver knows who “Marty B” is, so they probably won’t care that he is in town.

Ravens DB Domonique Foxworth
"Finish terps. I'm getting on the bandwagon. Let's go win turtles please"

How I See It: I didn’t know there was a bandwagon for the Terps. But if there is, you should hop off now. Wheels are already off.

Knicks guard Nate Robinson
"Yo I might have my own radio show on sirus xm radio once a week 4 and hour! Keep yall fingers crossed 4 da kid, hope all my tweeps listen up"

How I See It: Somehow I’m don’t think Nate Robinson is the next Dan Patrick.

Pro golfer Stewart Cink
"Thrashers opening night is here! Early in season for biggest rival to come to town--@coachnoss's Tampa Bay Lightning!"

How I See It: Stewart Cink is the only one that cares about a Thrashers-Lightning game, so I’m not sure if it is a big rivalry.