MVT: Most Valuable Tweeters

Jason Thompson
"Jus got done Shootaround. Its the end of the Road Trip vs Twolves. Need to Get this W n head bac to MY Bed!! Yessirr. Wat up twitt fam"

How I See It: The Sacramento Kings don't need to win anything. You are done. Just work for a better pick in the draft.

Kevin Harvick
"took the morning off and now at the shop getting ready to workout."

How I See It: Racers workout in the shop?

Takeo Spikes
"****ALERT*** JUST WOKE UP FROM A DREAM THAT WE BEAT THE LAKERS IN OVERTIME.I'M SURE IT WILL BE REALITY AROUND 930PM EST TONIGHT. WHOS W/ME!?"

How I See It: Umm Takeo, the Lakers play basketball, not football. But good luck beating them anyways.

Roger Clemens
"and BTW...I've taking great care of my body and to this date and time all the pipes on this body are still working great. Thx for asking..??"

How I See It: Please don't make another comeback. No one wants to see you in a baseball uniform again.

Jordan Hill
"Another beautiful day in zamunda (coming to america) ; ) mornin errbody"

How I See It: Good to know, Prince Akeem. Isn't your father Darth Vader?

Zac Diles
"What do y'all think about this Uconn vs Baylor womens game in the final 4? I hope Uconn can hit 3's all day, Griner is a beast in the paint."

How I See It: UConn by 50.

Stephen Curry
"Watching the Office marathon right now. Good stuff"

How I See It: I think Michael Scott has been managing the Warriors for the past few years. That would explain it.

Mario Chalmers
"To everybody that ask we play the pistons tom. Man them girls at UCONN ain't nothin to play with. I got Baylor and them for the ship."

How I See It: While we’re on the subject, I’m pretty sure UConn’s women could beat the Pistons. Seriously.

Thurman Thomas
"What if N. Korea sank that ship in S. Korea by firing a missile at it.... Now what...And remember S. Korea is our Allie right"

How I See It: Well, I think North Korea is as much of an “Allie” as South Korea. But South Korea is definitely our ally, yes.

Carmelo Anthony
""The leaders of the new cool" show tonight at club obsession. gonna be crazy. Lets go"

How I See It:I'm sensing another suspension for Melo.

Shelden Williams
"apparently i am late but according to the reaction of people on here i was not the only one who didn't know that pluto is no longer a planet"

How I See It: Pluto isn’t a planet?!?!? WHAT????? (Kidding. I knew. Yet I’m still outraged.)

Vernon Davis
"who saw me on E last night & what ya'll think?"

How I See It: I didn't see you, but I think that you shouldn't tell everybody that you did Ecstasy. Goodell sees all.

Lolo Jones
"And please don't ask a track athlete this: How fast do you run the 40 in? (Umm I'm not a football player)"

How I See It: It's not like I asked you how hard your slider breaks.

Jonathan Stewart
"ahhh just chillin at the house enjoying a nice cup of minute made white grape juice"

How I See It: A man of true culture and refinement.

Royal Ivey
"I am one of those who would rather sink with faith than swim without it"

How I See It: Definitely could've made this more persuasive. Royal, sinking is a bad thing.

Jose Canseco
"Don't be jealous haters just cause ur wifes and girlfriends r masterbating to my picture"

How I See It: :0

Rod Benson
"True story RT @amclouth23: @boomtho it is a recession, you gotta keep a 'stache...#justsaying"

How I See It: Gimme some of that Tom Selleck.

John Calipari
"Congrats to Matthew and our women's team. Picked 11th in the SEC and now one win from the Final Four. Amazing job!"

How I See It: At least someone over there is having some success.

Irene Cho
"Got new moon on DVD! Woo! I know...I'm like every other teenage crazed fan..but you know what?! I DON'T CARE!"

How I See It: *Shudders*

Eric Barton
"I'm the worst call of duty player on earth"

How I See It: Yeah, but I'm sure you could toss anyone of them in real life.

Jason Thompson
"RT @jalenrose: #nbafacts. Who is better Kobe or Lebron is the most debated topic since BIG vs 2pac!"

How I See It: I don't understand why this is such a huge debate right now. One word should really end this quickly: Rings.

Martellus Bennett
"Broadcasting live now! See me at http://www.ustream.tv/channel/moonshine-kids-b telling jokes"

How I See It: Telling jokes? Ok, I have a good one: the Dallas Cowboys will be a Super Bowl contender next season. That one should get you some laughs.

Clay Matthews
"Got all these chick flicks 2 watch but no chick 2 watch em with!!"

How I See It: Seriously Clay? You are an NFL linebacker, either man up and watch a different movie or man up and get a chick.

Shannon Miller
"Florida wins SEC Gymnastics Championship! Go Gators!"

How I See It: Yeah you better not question the Gators….Urban Meyer will challenge you to a fight.

John Thornton
"We better man up and hit John Wall. he's controlling the game for UK."

How I See It: Seriously, someone should actually hit him. It might be the only way of stopping the guy.

Thomas Howard
"This Kentucky vs. West Virgin game is like a National Championship game in its own right"

How I See It: West Virgin? Huh? Interesting new name choice by the Mountaineers. Very racy.

Ndamukong Suh
"Vegas baby so much fun lookin forward to tonight, X/S should be crazy wit the boys"

How I See It: Looks like Suh is already learning how to be a professional athlete. Should he desire anything other than boys, he should just give Tiger a call.

Reggie Bush
""It's gonna take more than hate to get my focus off" -Jeezy "

How I See It: With no Kim, what exactly are you focusing on Reggie?

Bo Van Pelt
"Rule 2 for spectating- if your name is not John daly and u r wearing loud mouth pants and yelling "u da man" -u need to evaluate things."

How I See It: With his new underwear ads, John Daly doesn't even wear pants anymore.

Chris Johnson
"Boy I aint seen dis many old naked people in my life they walking round here like dey got close on vegas super wild "

How I See It: Here's to praying HBO never chooses the Titans for Hard Knocks.

Nick Mangold
"After careful deliberation and thought, I have decided to go with pasta with red sauce. I'm quite excited"

How I See It: Nothing quite like staring at your cabinet trying to decide what to have for dinner for 30 minutes only to realize that pasta is the only thing in there.

Rey Maualuga
"Where is Cincinnati Gardens"

How I See It: Firstly, I hope that's a beer garden otherwise Rey is no longer welcome back at USC. Secondly, Rey, you have a million billion dollars. If your car doesn't have a built in navigation system, there's this thing called the Internet where you can look up any destination and it tells you how to get there. Genius stuff really.

Sean Avery
"Police escort to the Airport...."

How I See It: Most likely the police aren’t escorting Sean. They are escorting everyone else to protect them from Sean.

Jay Feely
"I remember Lloyd Carr getting mad at me (good natured) for rooting for upsets in NCAA tourney b/c I always played for Power favorites"

How I See It: I remember getting sort of mad at Lloyd Carr for losing to Ohio State a bunch of times ... and then Rich Rodriguez showed up. Now I’m really pissed.

Michael Waltrip
"I wish I was driving tomorrow. Last Friday was fun !"

How I See It: Don’t have too much fun when you drive. As the commercial says: drive drunk, you will get caught.

Chris Douglas-Roberts
"Please stop comparing that 08 Memphis team to this Kentucky team. Pleeeease! They're good, but please...stop."

How I See It: Yeah, at least Kentucky can make free throws. Ooooh, too soon?

Kenny Wallace
"I was trying to show my whole life on twitter with snap shots...About got myself killed couple times tweeting while walking into parked cars"

How I See It: Your life would not only flash before you own eyes, it would flash before the eyes of your entire base of followers.

Joe Lauzon
"I don't care if its 40 degrees out... it was 70 Saturday and that means its Spring. I am wearing shorts until October! "

How I See It: I started doing this in February.

Chris Douglas-Roberts
"Nasty...since a kid I had the cooties in school"

How I See It: Did anyone not have cooties?

Jason Grilli
"I wish I had a penny for every time someone commented on my cool crutches or asked what happened to me. I would have made $793.49 thus far."

How I See It: What do cool crutches consist of? Do they have a racing stripes or flames painted on?

John Calipari
"Did you vote yet? If not, Text '1' to 345345 to vote for John Wall as Naismith National Player of the Year. If so, vote again!"

How I See It: Why don't you focus on Cornell first, Coach Cal? Besides, Sherron Collins deserves it more even though Kansas lost.

Shaun Phillips
"Can u guys believe american airline chargers for over weight bags even in first class. Worst airline by far?s"

How I See It: I'm sure you can afford the extra few dollars.

Darrell Green
"I am serious.I am so tired of hearing about so many young people shooting themselves in the foot."

How I See It: It's the new cool thing to do.

Dana White
"go to www.680news.com and take the poll to legalize MMA in Ontario"

How I See It: Legalize MMA? Is that like the movement to legalize marijuana in the U.S.? End the Canadian War on MMA!

Michelle Wie
"The 2010 Kia Sorento is awesome...I just drove one for the first time and I am so impressed. Tons of space and... http://bit.ly/bR161c"

How I See It: Can Michelle even drive yet? I thought she was like 12 years old.

John Daly
"WOOOOOOO PIGGGGGGGG SOOOOOIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE GO HOGS!!!!!!"

How I See It: Drunk tweeting from the legend Mr. John Daly himself? I wouldn't bet against it.

Adam Jones
"my squad unc is on next. been a down year, but they can win something. and they have been playin harder. i like it"

How I See It: The NIT is quite a great time to start playing harder.

Lamar Odom
"In on Facebook now. Holla! http://bit.ly/a7Ttj3"

How I See It: C’mon Lamar, only about three years too late.

Elliott Sadler
"SIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Only team I hate worst than DOOK is KANSAS!! Great day to be a Tarheel!, we win and jayhawks loose! Hahahhaha"

How I See It: Since the Tarheels got their “win” in the NIT, I’m pretty sure it’s not a great day to be a tarheel.

Thurman Thomas
"I don't like Kentucky"

How I See It: Kentucky doesn’t like you.

Svetlana Kuznetsova
"if u see me with a bruce on my forehead a size of my head!who is following me would know from where i got it !heheheh"

How I See It: Ok, I think I get what is happening here: Svetlana has a picture of Bruce Springsteen on her forehead. Yep that’s definitely it.

Maurice Jones-Drew
"Why is the player from KU crying???"

How I See It: Probably not because his team lost or anything like that. No idea what it could be.

Zac Diles
"That just messed everybodys brackets up LOL..."

How I See It: Sorry Zac but NOBODY’S LAUGHING.

Trent Shelton
"If i was mike bibby i would have got mad to for my teammate touching me like that lmao"

How I See It: Can I get some context please?

Ndamukong Suh
"Very nice facility, coachs and owner here in Detroit , def will have to say I did enjoy my trip but it is bac to NEB now!!"

How I See It: I guess the only time anyone is ever excited to go to Nebraska is when they're leaving Detroit.

Greg Anthony
"Would Mike Anderson ever consider leaving Missouri?"

How I See It: ...yes?

J.R. Smith
"whats going on in yall world!"

How I See It: Knew he was an alien. Knew it.

Candace Parker
"Omg! Gettn my hair done!!!!!!! Excitement"

How I See It: I won't let the fact that you tweet like my little sister take away from the huge crush I have on you, Candace.

Thomas Howard
"I hope GeorgeTown loses so everyones brackets can be messed up...that's the beauty of March Madness Baby"

How I See It: Wow, somebody hates humanity in general.

Shelden Williams
"ask vandy, notre dame and maybe soon to be georgetown"

How I See It: I’m not sure what question Shelden wants me to ask these teams, but I have a question of my own ... why? Why did you three have to kill my bracket?

Jeff Green
"@jHARD13 dude i am about to cry..this is bad if we lose...if it wasnt for these baby e-trade commercials ill be going insane lol"

How I See It: The biggest tragedy of all this is actually the E-Trade baby commercials! The new baby is an impostor, and just makes my bracket pain even worse. I hate March Madness.

Royal Ivey
"Georgetown is done!!!!!"

How I See It: And so is my bracket.

Ndamukong Suh
"Hello Detroit"

How I See It: Two words no NFL draft prospect ever wants to say.

Shaun Phillips
"About to check out this clippers game. Yes yes of course I'm Spiked out about to trip this referee. Ill be next to the clippers bench."

How I See It: Next to the Clippers bench? Why doesn’t he just move closer and join the team? They could definitely use the help.

Fabian Washington
"Kiss me im Irish. Na im not really irish but you can still kiss me."

How I See It: Fabian O’Washington.

John Calipari
"My man, Mr. Charles, has treated us like royalty and we are being stuffed w/ BBQ shrimp, escargot and an unreal split pea and shrimp soup."

How I See It:Royalty? BBQ Shrimp? Mr. Charles? Sounds like an NCAA VIOLATION!!!

Larry Fitzgerald
"I hope he does 2.He would be a great addition 2 our team RT @omfgitskami: @Lfitzgerald11 I hope Joey Porter signs with the Cards!"

How I See It: If by “great addition” you mean an “overrated player that is a huge distraction in the lockerroom,” then yes he would be a “great addition.”

Swin Cash
"In the gym @ESPN working it out! The world wide leader in sports has everything I need accept a court. Oh wait that's outside 2mor its on :)"

How I See It:How about someone to teach you some grammar? Looks like they have everything EXCEPT a court and an English teacher. I hope you ACCEPT this subtle lesson.

Jeremy Shockey
"@OGOchoCinco LET me know you in miami?? IM HERE IF YOU WANT TO GET TOGETHER "

How I See It: That has trouble written all over it.

Baron Davis
"Who r ur NCAA dark horses?"

How I See It: Arkansas Pine-Bluff looked pretty good today. I'll take them against Duke.

Stewart Cink
"Wow I've had a lot of calls today from friends who have decided to come to the Masters this year. "

How I See It: This is your chance to show them who you are.

Danica Patrick
"I guess I am in a contest and you all know how competitive I am - haha.... Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive contest"

How I See It: I would say you would definitely win sexiest driver.

Kevin Durant
"New Kevin Durant Blog Post: It's March Madness Time!"

How I See It: And our Horns are going nowhere.

Kerron Clement
"Chipotle hits the spot right about now. Starving!"

How I See It: The man has good taste.

Lindsey Vonn
"In the big apple! It's pretty chilly and cloudy though :( I am anxious for some sun and warm temps!"

How I See It: Don't you ski for a living?

Thurman Thomas
"What a blessing it was to b given life"

How I See It: I guess it's better 40 years late than never to be grateful.

Nick Barnett
"Traffic is crazy in LA lol man!!"

How I See It: Word?