MVT: Most Valuable Tweeters

Tim Tebow
"We fully support Coach Studesville... He will do a great job in his new position and will make Broncos fans proud of this team! GB2"

How I See It: Why do I keep reading this as "Urban Meyer for Broncos coach 2011?"

Amare Stoudemire
"What’s the average age of the Knicks this year?"

How I See It: Well below your current scoring average.

Larry Fitzgerald
"@kurt13warner miss ya man! Tell the wife and kids I said hello"

How I See It: Not satisfied with your Fordham QB, Larry? Stop trying, he's not getting off the couch with four games left to play.

Curt Schilling
".296 13 HR 75 or so RBI's = 20+MM a year? 50 SB a year with a .337 OBP? I love Carl Crawford, plays his ass off, but 20x8? GRAB THAT CARL!"

How I See It: Ugh, now Schilling's going try to take credit for this signing, somehow.

Danny Granger
"In Milwaukee and there is absolutely nothing to do here"

How I See It: I feel like at least ten NBA players tweet this every week.

Jose Canseco
"Next item up for ouction spend a day with jose. Who's gonna start the bidding"

How I See It: I can only imagine: Wake up, eat breakfast, shoot up steroids. Eat lunch, shoot up steroids. Eat dinner, shoot up steroids. Rage with Mark McGwire. Take HGH and go to sleep.

Jozy Altidore
"Today reminded me of those Dominoes pizza kids who were farting on pizzas and all that. What ever happened to those kids??"

How I See It: What ever happened the U.S. soccer team? Come out again in three and a half years, please.

Jim Craig
"Pats vs Jets a great example of two different coaches both who teach their TEAM that winning is all that matters"

How I See It: And eating. And spying. And winning too, I guess.

Sasha Vujacic
"Special thanks to all of my fans who came out to the AT&T store in Newport on Saturday!!!"

How I See It: Right, cause they came for you, not Maria Sharapova. You are one lucky man, Sasha Vujacic,

LeBron James
"Peyton does on the field. Good or bad! People get on TV and think they can say whatever they want! And it's always former players! Crazy!!"

How I See It: You dig yourself into these holes, Mr. "Decision."

Ryan Clark
"Hey people! Just trying to catch up on the New England Brady's. Short week. I know this for a fact. If we don't stop Tom, It's troubles"

How I See It: Wow, Ryan, how much film did you have to watch to come to this conclusion, 30 seconds?.

John Abraham
"Watchn Inception and lost as a mfer"

How I See It: A little late to the party, John, but the movie definitely has a way of messing with the mind .

Jose Canseco
"310 862 6309 haters can call me now and confront me ,where are the haters so far its been nice people,are you haters scared"

How I See It: Is Canseco serious with giving out his number on Twitter? This shows he really has nothing better to do all day than deny using steroids and throw his former teammates under the bus.

Joe Namath
"Just watched Rex's press conference. I'm not sure who's better looking - I think its a toss up but it'd be hard tossin either of em!GO #JETS"

How I See It: After that press conference I am thinking Rex Ryan may look even better with that blonde wig on.

Stephon Marbury
"I HAVE TO SAY THAT I'M SO HAPPY FOR AI AND THE COUNTRY OF TURKEY. THE LOVE THAT HAS BEEN SHOWN FROM THAT COUNTRY,TOWARDS AI IS GOD's LOVE."

How I See It: The two of you would still be playing in the NBA had it not been for your poor attitudes and cancerous effects on a team.

Ryan Grant
"Are there tornado warnings going on right now in Green bay? Lol"

How I See It: The forecast: Tornados with a 50 percent chance of Favre.

Donte Whitner
"I wear I wear I weaaar no pants"

How I See It: It gets boring in Buffalo ... sometimes you just have to try something new.

Kenny Moore
"Had so much fun at Panthers in the park!!!!"

How I See It: That sounds extremely dangerous, and not fun at all.

Jose Canseco
"Email spendadaywithjose@yahoo.com for info and pricing Only a few spots left!"

How I See It: Wait, about pricing -- do I get paid or do I have to pay to spend a day with Jose?

Jeff Green
"Man, i can already tell this is gonna be a HOT summer..."

How I See It: The forecast: Hot with a very good chance of Al Gore discussing global warming.

Vernon Davis
"who saw me on E last night & what ya'll think?"

How I See It: I didn't see you, but I think that you shouldn't tell everybody that you did Ecstasy. Goodell sees all.

Lolo Jones
"And please don't ask a track athlete this: How fast do you run the 40 in? (Umm I'm not a football player)"

How I See It: It's not like I asked you how hard your slider breaks.

Jonathan Stewart
"ahhh just chillin at the house enjoying a nice cup of minute made white grape juice"

How I See It: A man of true culture and refinement.

Royal Ivey
"I am one of those who would rather sink with faith than swim without it"

How I See It: Definitely could've made this more persuasive. Royal, sinking is a bad thing.

Jose Canseco
"Don't be jealous haters just cause ur wifes and girlfriends r masterbating to my picture"

How I See It: :0

Ozzie Guillen
"Just saw and talked to nolan wow one of the best ever what a pleasure."

How I See It: I think what Ozzie means is “[expletive deleted].”

Jose Canseco
"The movie on my life if interested email me at jc7264@yahoo.com"

How I See It: Right now, IMDb has Daniel-Der Zauberer ranked at the top (bottom?) of the IMDb Bottom 100 movies. I think that’s about to change.

Darrell Green
"Retiring, getting cut and and just plane old quitting, is a part of the the professional sports business."

How I See It: I assume spelling “plain” wrong is also part of the business.

Apolo Ohno
"Getting ready to jump off this plane in Denver. It's been a long day. Check out this sweet pic - http://tweetphoto.com/13271583"

How I See It: From the Olympics to jumping off planes? Apolo Ohno is awesome.

Antrel Rolle
"It's pretty sweet being a free agent...check out new blog jus posted at my website www.rolle21.com"

How I See It: Antrel sounds like a guy that just broke up with his girlfriend. He tells himself that it is great being single, but then after about an hour he realizes he is alone with no girlfriend, or in this case no job.

Fabian Washington
"I scream you scream we all scream for ice cream. LMAO"

How I See It: I tried screaming for ice cream with my mom once ... didn’t work too well. I got a timeout.

Jose Canseco
"B e careful with the irs they r coming down hard on people"

How I See It: And recently, the amount of tax dollars we owe has been on steroids.

Cliff Avril
"It's funny what people say to u sometimes..."

How I See It: Cliff, you’re on the Lions. Take it like a man.

Kevin Johnson
"Click the link to the see the press conference in which I endorsed Tyreke Evans for Rookie of the Year. RekeROY! http://bit.ly/cuJpQD"

How I See It: “Endorsed?” Really? This is what the NBA Rookie of the Year award has come to?

Mark Sanchez
"My buddy Ryan is running the LA Marathon for the John Wayne Cancer Institute. Check out the link www.firstgiving.com/ryanrunsla"

How I See It: By "Ryan," do you mean Rex Ryan? Because that would be AWESOME to see Rex Ryan run a marathon. Especially for a good cause.

Nick Barnett
"Does anyone want a tour of my home in Cali?? If I can get 1500 replys I will do one fasure"

How I See It: Are you selling it? No? Is the offseason that boring?

Natasha Hastings
"@sidneyrice u just disappeared. Lol. What's goin on wit u?"

How I See It: Can't take a hint.

Cliff Avril
"At Gladys Knights chicken and waffles... Bout to grub"

How I See It: See Nick, this is how you spend an offseason.

Jose Canseco
"If u no a haiter expose them to me and the world"

How I See It: Jose Canseco: Officer of Twittilante Justice.

Rhys Lloyd
"May go to dicks later and buy a punching bag.. "

How I See It: 10 years ago, I'd of had a field day with this one.

Ivan Babikov
"Raining hard in Whistler this morning. We'll get wet and cold skiing today"

How I See It: Safe bet.

Jose Canseco
"There is just too many of you to help at one sitting! I have to run. Enjoy your day!"

How I See It: How screwed up must your life be when you're willing to stand IN LINE for help from Jose Canseco?

Martellus Bennett
"second bowl is always better than the 1st"

How I See It: Never lied about that.

Michael Waltrip
"I was just reminded that I had asparagus last evening."

How I See It: Some very subtle humor from Mr. Waltrip.

Chad OchoCinco Johnson
"Man I am gonna be on with the homie @revis24 on first take also, this is gonna be cool"

How I See It: Is Darrelle gonna shut you down on there too?

Kassim Osgood
"If I said I love you all, does that make me weird? Cuz I love all of y'all, all of y'all are beautiful!"

How I See It: It is a little weird, Kassim. I mean, I barely know you.

Lance Moore
"It feels great to be a champion!"

How I See It: Thanks for rubbing it in.

Jose Canseco
"Don't do business with a memorabilia dealer named Dough Aimes from North Carolina most of his stuff is fake or stolen. Especially my stuff."

How I See It: Never trust a man named Dough.

Michelle Wie
"I am so excited and honored to partner with Kia Motors! http://bit.ly/c9Rc5t"

How I See It: Are you even old enough to drive?

Donnie Avery
"Just seen about 6 chicks i kno in the New Slim Thug music video....lmao"

How I See It: And the Rams have 6 combined wins in the past three seasons. I know this is completely unrelated and entirely coincidental, but I had to point it out.

Shaun Phillips
"Give me some stuff to make fun of."

How I See It: How about the St. Louis Rams?

Thurman Thomas
"Don't ask,Dont Tell, Dont touch Me,Dont look At Me,Dont Call my Name, Dont get Behind Me,Dont, Dont,Dont"

How I See It:I’m not going to ask or tell what the message of this tweet is, because I have no idea. Does he support “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?” Is he against it? Or maybe this is about Dwight Freeney’s injury?

Michael Strahan
"Been working on a campaign that hopefully will help a lot of people and inform them about something that could change their life."

How I See It: C’mon Mike. I'm pretty sure the last time you said this, you ended up in that weird Subway commercial singing opera with Justin Tuck. Let’s not do that again.

Jose Canseco
"Enough about me, lets talk about you and your life. What do you do? Where are you from? Lets talk about it.........."

How I See It: Am I at Guantanamo Bay right now?

Darrelle Revis
"How high is the sky?"

How I See It: Darrelle Revis: All-Pro cornerback and existentialist philosopher extraordinaire.

Jose Canseco
"The media is still trying to get hold of me to comment about Marks interview. They call me at all hours. Don't they think i sleep?"

How I See It: Poor Jose. I just know you have so much other important business to tend to.

Shaun Phillips
"Can someone find out who T pains stylist is. when u do look at them 2x then put your hand in the sky a slap them across the face. Thanks"

How I See It: Omitted: T-Pain's stylist is a Jets fan.

Emily Hughes
"More than 1,600 followers? This is great! Thank you all so much for your support! Nationals here I come...."

How I See It: Twitter finals?

Tony Hawk
"Happy MLK! I also have a dream... that we make it home through this storm safely"

How I See It: Bit of a stretch here.