MVT: Most Valuable Tweeters

Kirk Morrison
"Just ran through the Jacksonville Airport like I was OJ Simpson in that car commercial back in the day. Barely made my flight. #sweating"

How I See It: If you ran as fast as O.J. drove white Broncos, you probably would've made your flight with time to spare.

Nick Collison
"U can imagine the horror of realizing you have "my humps" by black eyed peas on your ipod as shuffle plays the song #mustbeavirus"

How I See It: Probably the same horror one experiences when checking out your Twitter picture, Collison.

Meryl Davis
"The snooze button is the meanest invention ever~who gives sleeping people the option to continue doing so in 5 min increments? Stop teasing!"

How I See It: That's why you get an alarm clock with a nine-minute snooze. It makes waking up a little sweeter.

Bryant McKinnie
"I'm down here on the beach 4 a meeting! Its very hot out here 2day. I'm early 4 a change, the ppl r 15min away."

How I See It: Meeting on the beach? Yes, please. How they expect you guys to be productive, though, I don't know.

Ottis Anderson
"is it me or does it seem the NBA Finals have been going on for a LONG time"

How I See It: I'm right there with you, Ottis. At least it ends tonight. Good luck Lakers/Celtics!

Ed Davis
"Check out the Jim Rome show today around 4:30et."

How I See It: There's only two reasons that I could think of on why Davis is promoting this show. 1) He's on it (in which case why would anyone want to be on that show?) or 2) Brooklyn Decker is doing a nude photo shoot on it.

Martellus Bennett
"Feeling like a modern day hippie. MSK in the building wat up Cleveland "

How I See It: So a hipster? Sorry, Bennett but you are anything but one.

Reggie Evans
"This new Sprint phone hard."

How I See It: Reason No. 543 why Reggie Evans should stick with basketball as his career choice.

Alexi Lalas
"Sitting at gate 55. LAX-Minn-Amsterdam-Joberg. 24+hour trip...and worth every minute."

How I See It: I just put this one here because it's a reminder of how close the WORLD CUP is! One week, baby!

Jessica Gysin
"No, twitter, I would not like to add my location when I tweet. Thanks for the stalkerish invitation though"

How I See It: Twitter is looking to take over the world.

Glen Davis
"Yeah everybody check out that iambigbaby.com my website!!!!!"

How I See It: I thought you didn't want to be called Big Baby.

Eric Maynor
"What should I do for my birthday on June 11th??? any suggestions??"

How I See It: Party.

Dhani Jones
"Who wants more beach photos?"

How I See It: I already saw enough of your show in Brazil.

Maurice Jones-Drew
"In line at security check point and I have gotten ask about fantasy football like 15 times... Lol"

How I See It: You are an important person to many.

Chad Ochocinco
"Me and my big brother @floydmayweather making some big moves, follow both of us so you guys don't miss the fun"

How I See It: The two of you together are big trouble.

Chris Bosh
"Reading a book called "Secrets of Mental Math" #stillanerd"

How I See It: Do you really need to a read a whole book to figure that out? The secret of mental math = buy a calculator.

Frank Trigg
"(203): God if you give us Biggie back you can have Justin Beiber"

How I See It: I couldn't agree more. Gotta love Texts From Last Night.

LaVar Arrington
"what did Tiger do? why does this woman feel like she can get 750million not to ever talk about him? sounds strange dnt u think?trend this"

How I See It: Wait, shouldn't the question be "Who did Tiger do?"

Rod Benson
"My new favorite restaurant sucks."

How I See It: Michael Scott is my hero. And so is Rod Benson for recognizing his brilliance.

Vernon Davis
"My teacher said I was pretty good for a rookie, and fyi shes pretty hot but unfortunately she's my teacher."

How I See It: Oh dear, her name's not Mrs. Robinson, is it? Don't go all Dustin Hoffman on us, Davis! It never works out!

Vernon Davis
"I'm excited about Ted Ginn, let's go it's time to work! Me, crab, Josh,Ted, Alex, and Frankie g. They can't stop us!"

How I See It: I thought only fans were irrationally optimistic in April.

Patrick O'Bryant
"Im no pussy i used to pitch back in the day so im def throwin from the mound. Im think a nice curve ball to keep em honest lol."

How I See It: I'm predicting a Carl Lewis-esque effort.

David Price
"Theres a penny, nickel, dime, and quarter standing on a building. All but the quarter just off...why did the quarter not jump?"

How I See It: ...if the answer is "because he had the most sense", I'm no longer a David Price fan.

John Calipari
"The possibility of Brandon having a year of credits before he enters college is unbelievable and he also has a 4.3 GPA"

How I See It: At least he'll have a better excuse for not going to class than "I'm a basketball player."

Donte Stallworth
"Beanie Sigel verse on "Guess Who's Back" wit Scarface & Jigga goes sooooooo hard!!!"

How I See It: The man knows his music. Ironic much?

Tom Crean
"As we enter the NBA playoffs, keep this thought from Doug Collins. " At playoff time your top 3 players have got to make plays.""

How I See It:Very insightful. “I can feel it coming in the air tonight,” Collins once said of the playoffs. Wait, that was Phil Collins.

C.J. Spiller
"Huge news everyone! Signed wit @adidasUS 2day n will be rockin 3 stripes when I take over the NFL next season."

How I See It: Oh great, another self-righteous, arrogant tweeter. Welcome to the NFL, C.J.

Vernon Davis
"On south beach having an awesome dinner for 1!"

How I See It: I know Vernon may be a me-first player, but dinner for one? He's taking it too far.

Andrew Bogut
"Looking @ old muscle cars for those asking"

How I See It: Here's the thing: absolutely nobody was asking.

Victoria Azarenka
"write myself a book!"

How I See It: Wow Victoria must be either lonely or bored ... she should go hang with fellow lonely heart Vernon Davis.

Shaun Phillips
"#youremeber when you didn't have to pay bills cause mom and dad did. Those were the good days lol."

How I See It: Never lied about that.

John Calipari
"Long weekend recruiting and the signing period approaches. Time to add some players to the 2010-11 roster."

How I See It: Yeah, like all of the players.

Will Blackmon
"Whoa! Swat team is at 314 ashland rd. Sorry no pics. They would have def snatched me up!"

How I See It: Way to tell on yourself there.

Rick Fox
"R the Lakers healthy enough 2 repeat? Health issues crippled our team in 03 injuries arose in the playoffs. I ruptured a tendon in my _____?"

How I See It: Paging the Rick Fox Fan Club ...

Vernon Davis
"Doesn't matter what city you're in they still come find you."

How I See It: Probably should stop hanging out with Will Blackmon.

Vernon Davis
"who saw me on E last night & what ya'll think?"

How I See It: I didn't see you, but I think that you shouldn't tell everybody that you did Ecstasy. Goodell sees all.

Lolo Jones
"And please don't ask a track athlete this: How fast do you run the 40 in? (Umm I'm not a football player)"

How I See It: It's not like I asked you how hard your slider breaks.

Jonathan Stewart
"ahhh just chillin at the house enjoying a nice cup of minute made white grape juice"

How I See It: A man of true culture and refinement.

Royal Ivey
"I am one of those who would rather sink with faith than swim without it"

How I See It: Definitely could've made this more persuasive. Royal, sinking is a bad thing.

Jose Canseco
"Don't be jealous haters just cause ur wifes and girlfriends r masterbating to my picture"

How I See It: :0