MVT: Most Valuable Tweeters

Mardy Fish
"Happy Birthday @andyroddick"
How I See It: Oh, and by the way, I'm 13 spots ahead of you in the world rankings.

Rory McIlroy
"Getting some treatment on my arm in the ladies locker room in new haven..... Not a bad place to be ;) @CaroWozniacki"
How I See It: Number six-ranked golfer in the world at age 21, dating a beautiful Danish Blond, who happens to be the number one-ranked tennis player in the world...life's not so bad.

Plaxico Burress
"About to hit the movies with the family to see the Smurfs. Looking forward to the Reese's pieces and blue slurpee. Maybe gummi bears too."
How I See It: Don't bring a gun.

Lamar Odom
"What's going on guys?! I feel like i haven't been on in foreva. What's going on?"
How I See It: No, you're on "Keeping up With the Kardashians" reruns everyday.

For more MVT, check out ThePostGame.com, the new digital magazine from SportsFanLive and Yahoo! Sports.

Tim Tebow
"We fully support Coach Studesville... He will do a great job in his new position and will make Broncos fans proud of this team! GB2"

How I See It: Why do I keep reading this as "Urban Meyer for Broncos coach 2011?"

Amare Stoudemire
"What’s the average age of the Knicks this year?"

How I See It: Well below your current scoring average.

Larry Fitzgerald
"@kurt13warner miss ya man! Tell the wife and kids I said hello"

How I See It: Not satisfied with your Fordham QB, Larry? Stop trying, he's not getting off the couch with four games left to play.

Curt Schilling
".296 13 HR 75 or so RBI's = 20+MM a year? 50 SB a year with a .337 OBP? I love Carl Crawford, plays his ass off, but 20x8? GRAB THAT CARL!"

How I See It: Ugh, now Schilling's going try to take credit for this signing, somehow.

Danny Granger
"In Milwaukee and there is absolutely nothing to do here"

How I See It: I feel like at least ten NBA players tweet this every week.

Jose Canseco
"Next item up for ouction spend a day with jose. Who's gonna start the bidding"

How I See It: I can only imagine: Wake up, eat breakfast, shoot up steroids. Eat lunch, shoot up steroids. Eat dinner, shoot up steroids. Rage with Mark McGwire. Take HGH and go to sleep.

Jozy Altidore
"Today reminded me of those Dominoes pizza kids who were farting on pizzas and all that. What ever happened to those kids??"

How I See It: What ever happened the U.S. soccer team? Come out again in three and a half years, please.

Jim Craig
"Pats vs Jets a great example of two different coaches both who teach their TEAM that winning is all that matters"

How I See It: And eating. And spying. And winning too, I guess.

Sasha Vujacic
"Special thanks to all of my fans who came out to the AT&T store in Newport on Saturday!!!"

How I See It: Right, cause they came for you, not Maria Sharapova. You are one lucky man, Sasha Vujacic,

LeBron James
"Peyton does on the field. Good or bad! People get on TV and think they can say whatever they want! And it's always former players! Crazy!!"

How I See It: You dig yourself into these holes, Mr. "Decision."

Tiger Woods
"Getting a lesson in @ replies here it goes.. http://twitpic.com/3bp5uj"

How I See It: Tiger taking a lesson? Okay, now we know it isn't actually him tweeting.

Larry Fitzgerald
"??The Ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort & convenience,but where he (cont) http://tl.gd/77qd7k"

How I See It: So, in other words, we should not measure your career based on your four Pro Bowl appearances, but rather if you can ever find success after Kurt Warner's retirement?

Nate Robinson
"I'm n Cleveland bored outta my witz #WordAApp! Anybody know if it's anything to do? Anybody cooking would love a home cooked meal #WordAApp!"

How I See It: I guarantee you there's a LeBron James jersey burning within a three-block radius if you want entertainment.

Dez Bryant
"I'm wanting to watch twilight eclipse on a website..anyone know any websites?"

How I See It: Dez, I know it's been a tough rookie season, but this is a little too low even for someone on a 3-8 team.

Curtis Granderson
"happy 41st birthday Mariano Rivera!!! http://fb.me/EVWZvJYB"

How I See It: This will make the Yankees think twice about a multi-year deal.

Roddy White
"I can't believe tht wideout blame good for dropping a ball I have dropped a lot of balls and never once thought it was god fault"

How I See It: Okay, so Matt Ryan isn't god. Check him off the list.

Ozzie Guillen
"Hard work put u in nice situation my fat boy"

How I See It: Your previous tweet, "Juan uribe 3 years iam proud uribe great job buddy," was just a tad sweeter.

John Calipari
"That's a first. I can never remember a time when she chose my game over something for Erin, Megan or Brad. Have a wonderful birthday!"

How I See It: A perfect example of why Coach Cal is such a good recruiter. Nobody could care even the slightest bit whether or not Calipari's wife goes to the game tonight, but the fact that he updates his page every 30 minutes with useless information gets him "in" with teenagers.

Steven Jackson
"Ok.. So I look out my hotel room and see someone swimming in the pool. Then I look left and see ppl ice skating.. I'm confused."

How I See It: Denver's a weird city, my friend.

LeBron James
"It's just 2 easy!! I smell a blowout"

How I See It: "Maybe I led you to believe it was easy, when it wasn't." -- Michael Jordan.

Wes Johnson
"Just leaving Roosevelt Elementary School w/ @J_Flynn . Had a great time reading the Three Little Pigs. Our Mascot Crunch did his thing lol"

How I See It: So the NBA Read to Achieve campaign really does exist. It’s not just some advertising scam.

Pat Fitzgerald
"Honored to be considered one of the best football programs with on the field success AND academics!! GO CATS! http://tinyurl.com/2udwdqd"

How I See It: Way to stick it to Vandy, Pat! Totally outsmarted them in Week 1.

Allen Iverson
"My wife and I lost 8 pounds each in a week off this diet -> http://tinyurl.com/28dzafv really amazing"

How I See It: The Acai Berry diet is definitely not THE ANSWER to reviving your basketball career.

Marcellus Wiley
"Runnin on the beach, saw 3 kids playing football, I wanted to play catch w/them & they said NO! Dad tells them who "I am" kids still said No"

How I See It: Marcellus, I hate to break it to you man, but this means you got old really darn fast.

Michael Oher
"My former teammate and close friend Mike Wallace for the Steelers just told me it will be an honor to play against me this Sunday"

How I See It: Please tell me I wasn’t the only person who expected you to say Sandra Bullock, Tim McGraw or Kathy Bates as your former teammate.

Sinorice Moss
"Thank you @SorayaLewis & @Revis24 I got you. Get healthy bruh."

How I See It: And Darrelle Revis becomes the 5,000th person to send Sinorice Moss a “get well” message over the past five years!

Eric Barton
"Wanna go see wallstreet at 4:20"

How I See It: You know what, that could be exactly what the Browns need! Screw practice. Maybe the front office will learn how to actually use their money wisely.

Daequan Cook
"Just finished my first practice of training camp slow start but finished strong gotta change some habits frm my old team but a Good start"

How I See It: Yeah, I was just as surprised when I found out Miami was even looking for someone else to play small forward. Who’d they sign over you again?

Shaquille O'Neal
"See what happens when u laff at people da same person dat got rondo got me http://m.plixi.com/p/47526042"

How I See It: If Shaq’s the Diesel engine, what does that make Rajon Rondo? Windshield wiper fluid?

LeBron James
"Always good to be back on the field. Call me LeBron Randy Moss James. Yes Sir!! http://twitvid.com/9M3IS"

How I See It: Makes sense. You would go play with Tom Brady if you were in the NFL. Not that you’re arrogant or anything.

Christian Vande Velde
"Saw a bear cross the road, only 200 feet in front of me, yesterday while out training. Beat that. #shityoudontseeeveryday"

How I See It: The other night I was in my bathroom and there was a cockroach under my towel. Yeah, I guess that doesn’t really beat your story.

Chris Bosh
"Grown men jamming to Katy Perry. Lol #funnythingsyouseeintheclub"

How I See It: So that’s what Wade, LeBron and Bosh do on weekends. No wonder they're close.

Jennie Finch
"Touring an egg farm! http://twitpic.com/2cbi93"

How I See It: That’s next up on the agenda for the aforementioned Heat players.

Larry Fitzgerald
"Cardinals fans,if u can get to Flagstaff,come out tomorrow night & watch the UFC fights w/ my teammates at buffalo wild wings!"

How I See It: If you’re lucky, the Cardinals will carry over their training camp fight to go along with the UFC theme.

Sanya Richards
"That's a big oooops! Yikes!!! RT @hunnibee10: I think I just told this woman her husband is cheating on her..ooops!"

How I See It: Careful. Tweets like that may cause car crashes. And subsequent losses of millions of dollars, etc.

Frank Trigg
"Nico wants to see naked men. Off we go."

How I See It: At least you're supportive?

Michael Oher
"Phone number!"

How I See It: Alright, alright...Christ, what happened to that docile brute I saw Sandra Bullock tucking into bed? 773-3....

Larry Fitzgerald
"Chicago what's good for tonight?"

How I See It: Let's see ... we got Cubs baseball, gunfire and the Taste. Not very much actually.

Dwyane Wade
"Imma start a website called What little do they know.com..l2ms"

How I See It: Is anybody else convinced that the big NBA free agents all think this ad nauseum coverage is hilarious?

Fabricio Oberto
"Que huevos!!!"

How I See It: Indeed.

Shaun Phillips
"About to check out this clippers game. Yes yes of course I'm Spiked out about to trip this referee. Ill be next to the clippers bench."

How I See It: Next to the Clippers bench? Why doesn’t he just move closer and join the team? They could definitely use the help.

Fabian Washington
"Kiss me im Irish. Na im not really irish but you can still kiss me."

How I See It: Fabian O’Washington.

John Calipari
"My man, Mr. Charles, has treated us like royalty and we are being stuffed w/ BBQ shrimp, escargot and an unreal split pea and shrimp soup."

How I See It:Royalty? BBQ Shrimp? Mr. Charles? Sounds like an NCAA VIOLATION!!!

Larry Fitzgerald
"I hope he does 2.He would be a great addition 2 our team RT @omfgitskami: @Lfitzgerald11 I hope Joey Porter signs with the Cards!"

How I See It: If by “great addition” you mean an “overrated player that is a huge distraction in the lockerroom,” then yes he would be a “great addition.”

Swin Cash
"In the gym @ESPN working it out! The world wide leader in sports has everything I need accept a court. Oh wait that's outside 2mor its on :)"

How I See It:How about someone to teach you some grammar? Looks like they have everything EXCEPT a court and an English teacher. I hope you ACCEPT this subtle lesson.

Tyrus Thomas
"It's 67 degrees in Charlotte!!!!"

How I See It: You can really tell he'd been in Chicago for too long.

Merril Hoge
"Redskins cb Deangalo Hall will be on NFL live with us at 4 pm Espn! Called him big money when I saw him in the hall we both laughed"

How I See It: And probably at two different things.

Larry Fitzgerald
""What you are is what you have been,and what you will be is what you do now""

How I See It: I don't even think Larry caught this.

Kerron Clement
"Oh I like listening to Chipmunk versions of @MariahCarey songs #Random"

How I See It: More like #creepyashell.

Rey Maualuga
"Physical Therapy. Definitely making progress..."

How I See It: Still too soon for a DUI joke?

Fabian Washington
"Shake-N-Bake"

How I See It: Nope, Hamburger Helper. Check and checkmate.

Pat Fitzgerald
"On the recruiting trail- I'll be all over the country throughout the next month wrapping up our 2010 recruiting class! GO CATS!"

How I See It: Get. A. Kicker!

John Daly
"15 hours or a little over 1,000 miles"

How I See It: Common sense says that John's flying, but he could legitimately weigh a plane down that severely.

Bill Romanowski
"Getting ready for the Raiders Press Conference. Tune in to Comcast at 12pm PST."

How I See It: Over/under on the number of Jagerbombs he's "getting ready with": 6.

Brandon Jennings
"#MM BOW WOW ft PLEASURE P- I'm gon make it"

How I See It: And the Rookie of the Year goes to...Tyreke Evans. No Bow Wow fan will get my vote.

Larry Fitzgerald
"Detroit really isnt the most happening place 2 b.Its cold & snowing.We gotta take care of business 2morrow.Get a win & get home!"

How I See It: Larry Fitzgerald has been in Detroit for no more than 2 days and he already can’t wait to leave.

Stuart Schweigert
"HAHAHA Did anyone see Wyoming's incredibly blown coverage in the New Mexico Bowl?"

How I See It: Honestly, don't think anyone saw that.

Michael Waltrip
"The Cowboys will win. Wana bet ?"

How I See It: Um, yes please.

Shaun Phillips
"@qbkilla happy bday."

How I See It: Happy Birthday, Warren Sapp. The Bucs could still use you.

Brandon Jennings
"Sbhcdbjdsjovfbcdbsjhdcjvfbhvdhxcbsvfbvfj"

How I See It: I agree whole-heartedly.

Ron Artest
"On December 4th Ron Artest is having a party at a secret location. It's called"December Dimes" email me for free tickets or for location!!"

How I See It: Um, I’m busy on December 4th I think. Yeah definitely.

Shayla Worley
"I like sleeping in on staurdays and I love college football game, I love not actin my age and good barbecue."

How I See It: We should definitely meet.

Mark May
"My best picks for next ND coach KIRK FERENCE,BOB STOOPS,TONY DUNGY"

How I See It: But if Charlie Weis is fired, what will you tweet about?

Larry Fitzgerald
"Taking off!Its a Business trip headed to Tennessee. Hit u guys when we make it in! Cardinals Nation stand up!"

How I See It: Cardinals Nation will try to stand up, but it gets pretty crowded on that bandwagon.

Ottis Anderson
"so, talk to me what was the best deal you found on black friday? best deal you are still looking for?"

How I See It: The best deal? Not participating in Black Friday shopping at all. Saves me the most money every time.

Larry Fitzgerald
"Whats up people. Were in St.Louis with some downtime before meetings. Hopefully we can leave here 7-3 tomorrow."

How I See It: If you don’t leave 7-3 after playing the Rams, then the NFC West should be banned from the playoffs.

Mark May
"That does it for charlie.....NEXT!!!!!!!"

How I See It: The day Charlie Weis is fired will be the happiest day of Mark May’s life.

Andrew Bogut
"First Day of rehab. Doing everything I can to be back sooner than later. Time to Ice and Stem some more. Go BUCKS lets get one in Elvistown."

How I See It: This is probably the only tweet today about the “Bucks” not referring to Ohio State.

Thurman Thomas
"Can I read the bill somewhere, is it online, c-span, etc...."

How I See It: Referring to the health bill I assume. You’d be the only one to read it probably. Including members of Congress.

Warren Sapp
"Trouble In Buckeye Land!! GO Big Blue!!!"

How I See It: If only Warren could have put on some pads for the Maize and Blue. 251 yards rushing today for the Bucks against the Wolverines.

Roger Clemens
"Congrats to the Yanks, Mr. Steinbrenner, and family! It had to be in the cards with breaking in the new yankee stadium. "

How I See It: Roger Clements tweets?

Mark May
"Charlie Weis should be fired if he loses AGIAN to Navy for a second time in 3yrs and twice in a row at home!!!!!!"

How I See It: About half of Mark May’s tweets are dedicated to bashing Notre Dame. And I love it.

Ryan Grant
"And we r off.....tampa be ready"

How I See It: Honestly, I don’t think Tampa will ever be ready for anything resembling a football game this season.

Pat Fitzgerald
"CATS WIN!! Thanks to all the NU students and fans who made it to the game! GO CATS!!"

How I See It: Great win by Northwestern and Coach Fitz, but I think we can all now admit that Iowa is terrible and that they could easily have less than four wins right now.

Chad Ochocinco
"OCNN : I didn't want any road blocks in there careers but its my time to shine in the music industry? Esteban is signed to Child Pleeze rcds"

How I See It: As long as Chad keeps on catching touchdowns, we can forgive him for calling himself Esteban and for living in his own world.

Nick Barnett
"Any big trades?"

How I See It: Sigh, yeah Nick. We've already sent your stuff to St. Louis.

Renee Montgomery
"Indecent Proposal: If someone offered you a million dollars to sleep with your husband/wife, what would you do? "

How I See It: For some guys, that million would be a bargain. Just ask Paul McCartney how much it cost him to sleep with his wife.

Christina Kim
"Just finished a 5mile run. Legs like jello hehehe. Love the inability to breathe, its freakin sweet! :-D "

How I See It: Jello is sweet, yes. Orange especially. And, by "inability", I'm sure Christina meant "ability". If not, somebody should check up on her.

Dhani Jones
"(via @AndrewWK) Party tip: Follow your instinct even if it feels crazy. Do what it tells you to do. No matter what, take that risk today!"

How I See It: Probably the worst tip in the history of tip-giving.

Pat Fitzgerald
"Proud to announce that SEVEN 'Cats were nominated to be Academic All-Americans this year!!"

How I See It: And Northwestern is a favorite to win the Academic BCS Championship. Gotta take what you can get I guess.