The Baldest Truth

When Chicago luminaries descend upon Copenhagen to charm IOC voters before Friday’s big Olympic-city choice, Al Capone will be smiling up from his eternal resting place.

It’s gonna be one helluva show.

Rio? Madrid? Tokyo? Please. They’ve got all the star power of the Pirates - after a few more trades with the Red Sox and Cubs.

While IOC types no doubt will be swayed by the Windy City icons blowing into Denmark, those of us who have lived here or visited for an extended time don’t need Oprah, Obama or other Olympic-class orators to convince us Chicago is a great city.

We know. And yet some of us wonder ...

Will getting the Games be the best thing to happen to Chicago since the Trail Blazers drafted Sam Bowie? Or the worst thing since Michael Jordan was chased out of town by Jerrys Krause & Reinsdorf?

Though I disagree with Mayor-for-life Daley that we “need” the 2016 Games to prove something - we already are world-class, Your Eminence - I do agree we’d reap some nice benefits.

Having covered five Olympics in five different countries, I’ve seen the good they can do. Those in Lillehammer for the ’94 Games who didn’t feel the magic must have been wearing magic-proof vests.

As a 15-year Chicago resident, however, I’m more than a little skeptical - and more than a lot concerned - about the potential for corruption of Olympic proportions.

Because when it comes to corruption, Chicago almost always realizes its full potential.

Let’s not even talk about Illinois’ last two elected governors, one in jail and the other knocking at the door. Nor should we blather on about the Cook County Board, which pushed through an unnecessary cash grab that makes Chicago the nation’s undisputed sales-tax gold medalist.

(While us commoners hear 10.25 percent and moan every time we go to the store, our elected officials chant: “We’re No. 1! We’re No. 1!”)

No, we don’t even need county and state hi-jinx to have fun in Chicago, where Mayor-for-life Daley is the ultimate wheeler, dealer, schemer and dreamer.

A thousand times the man promised that taxpayers wouldn’t be on the hook should Olympic costs exceed projections. Then, in one cleverly timed rope-a-dope move, he put us on the hook, dangled us to the sharks and shoveled out the chum.

It was Classic Daley, who never met a project too large nor a budget too small.

Let’s say Chicago gets the 2016 Games. (Really, can there be any doubt?) If you guess that 8 out of every 10 Olympic development dollars eventually will go to cronies of our mayor and other elected officials, I will call you naive for making such a gross underestimation.

Don’t worry, officials say, we’ll be transparent in everything we do.

How very reassuring, coming from folks who never fib, never understate a project’s expense, never rob from the poor to give to the rich.

So you see why I’m a tad conflicted about the 2016 Chicago Olympics.

Our infrastructure - trains, roadways, sewers, etc. - would get the major help it sorely needs. Many blighted areas would be beautified. There would be a heightened sense of community pride. The honchos promise all of this, and I have little doubt they’ll deliver.

If it means a few well-connected palms get greased over the next seven years, who are we commoners to quibble?

Negative nabobs say stuff like: “Wouldn’t it be nice if the mayor and his cronies were this motivated to fix our broken schools, shelter our homeless, feed our starving, aid our sick and improve the lives of one and all?”

C’mon folks, look at the big picture! I mean, we’ll be getting a velodrome, won’t we?

Many worry there will be more crime, perhaps even terrorist attacks. My Olympic experience tells me those should be the least of anyone’s concerns. Security will be tight. Chicago will be far safer during that 2016 fortnight than it will be tomorrow.

Congestion? Gridlock? Sure. But few seemed to mind the Loop being shut down for three days while Oprah filmed her season opener.

We’ll handle the Olympic inconvenience just fine. Smart folks will get out of town and rent out their homes, anyway. Chicagoans have great entrepreneurial spirit.

Some say only the rich will be able to attend events. While that’s true of Opening and Closing Ceremonies and other marquee events, there will be thousands of reasonably priced tickets available for the less-hyped events. Many even will be free. Don’t knock triathlon until you’ve seen it.

No, the Games themselves will be the good part. It’s the preliminary events that worry me.

The handouts. The insider deals. The glad-handing. The siphoning of money from our schools through tax-increment-financing schemes. The fleecing of gullible commoners. The make-believe transparency. The slush funds. The bribes. The blackmail. The political grandstanding.

But enough about the first 24 hours after we get awarded the Games.

If you’re confused about where I stand on all of this, get in line ... behind me.

I love the idea of the Olympics in Chicago.

I’m far less enthused about an Olympic-scale, Chicago-style Corrupt-A-Thon ... unless, of course, a few kickbacks for bald sports-hacks are part of the deal.

Read Mike Nadel’s musings daily at TheBaldestTruth.com.