The Sound of the Suburbs

To paraphrase Jerry Seinfeld, rooting for a sports team means rooting for laundry.

Or as Bill Maher said, you're wearing another man's jersey.

Fandom (short for fanaticism) usually originates in geography; I was born in Tulsa therefore I am ... a JJ Cale fan.

I was born in Long Island and grew up a Yankee fan. I suffered through many bad years (Horace Clarke/John Ellis/Celerino Sanchez etc.) and good (Munson/Guidry/Lyle/O'Neill/Jeter/Williams/Posada/Rivera etc.).

I still love the uniform, and I am a total capitalist but still ... I just can't find it in my heart to root for Mark Teixeira and Alex Rodriguez. They're just ... mercenaries. Yet for some reason I have no qualms with Sabathia or Swisher.

Why IS that? I just don't know.

And who cares anyway. I am an ink blot on the giant canvas that is Team Yankee. George Steinbrenner ... The Man. His sons ... arrogant pricks.

I offer absolutely no defense or rationale for my irrational line of thought.

Because the Yankees are simply unstompable. They may be beatable, but no one, not even the Phillies, will put the Ubangi Stomp on them.

They're just too rich, too privileged, too good.

So paradoxically, I like when they win but I'm secretly rooting against them.

But then I ponder a cat like Jorge Posada. What is he, 38? What a MAN. What a PLAYER. What a STUD.

He always calls a great game, then comes up with two down and a man on third and rips one to left for yet another clutch RBI. Jason Varitek in his prime (long gone) was good but no Posada. And that has proved to be the difference between Evil Empires.

Jorge Posada has not only shown zero signs of aging but cut a classic ESPN spot and then continues to get it up. And out.

He has joined the catcher elite in Pinstripe history and left his mark: Dickey, Berra, Munson, Posada. All clutch hitters. All great fielders. All men who helped elevate the likes of Allie Reynolds, Don Larsen, Ron Guidry and El Duque Hernandez to greatness.

Hall of Famers one and all.

So how can I NOT root for him? I do. I can. I will.

Look out Texas or Tampa (Texas). Here they come.