Wasif's World

There have been rumors floating around recently that Major League Baseball, in an effort to maintain a competitive balance, is considering floating realignment which, as I understand it, will rotate the teams in each division based on a number of factors.

Now, as much as I think the competitive balance is fine -- all six pro teams like Boston, New York, Philly, Los Angeles, Chicago have a legitimate chance to win every year, and if they can't, they have no trouble grabbing a player midseason from one of the 24 farm clubs out there, such as Pittsburgh or Kansas City -- I decided to look into this.

So I got a hold of the proposal from league offices. These aren't the final plans, mind you, just a version considered by the think tank that is the mail room staff at MLB in NYC, but it seems to make a lot of sense. And the theory behind the plan is quite simple.

Here, let me explain in layman's terms (as I am a layman much as my father was a layman before me and his father was a layman before him and his father's father before him was a blacksmith) the rules of realignment:

First off, the Yankees will be in their own division; the Red Sox will as well. The Red Sox will still be in the AL East, but the Yankees will move to the AL Not-Quite-As-Far-East.

The Pirates will be moved to the International League in Triple A and will be the farm system of the Phillies. The Phillies will be the farm system of the Mets.

Detroit will be in the new AL South Division every other year and the rest of the time, it will be in the Western Division of Major League Soccer.

Depending on record, the best team in the NL Central will play in the AL West the next year and the winner of the AL West will get a year off.

Both Chicago teams will play in a league that only faces both Los Angeles teams and both New York teams.

The Texas Rangers will align back to Washington and the Washington Nationals will realign back to Montreal.

Los Angeles and San Francisco will switch places.

Kansas City and St. Louis will compete in the new "Baby Back" Division. Pitchers on their teams will be able to use barbecue sauce in lieu of the rosin bag during games.

Expansion teams will be in a division all their own, but will need to be contracted. After contraction, baseball will introduce these teams as new expansion teams.

Some divisions will not be set until the season is underway. For instance, the last team to win ten games will realign into the same division as the first team to reach 30 wins.

All teams with animals, reptiles, birds and fish will be in one division while teams named with colors or geographical land masses are to be in another.

Teams with Cuban defectors on their active rosters are put in the Cuban division.

Cursed teams, likewise, are put there. This division will not be eligible for the playoffs ... or food rations ... or toilet paper. They must live in squalor.

Teams with offensive mascots such as the Indians and the Braves must play in their own division. They will be allowed to open and operate casinos at their stadiums, however.

Should a team have three rainouts in the first month of the season, it will be realigned to a sunnier division.

And finally, as payroll is a constant issue among competing teams, the highest salaried teams will be scheduled to play each other 100 times a year and will play the remaining teams twice a year.

If this passes (and I gotta tell you, at first glance, it makes a lot of sense) I predict we'll see some much more exciting baseball, especially during the playoffs ... except for the teams in the Cuban division, but that's only common sense.